Top 10 Sexiest Monsters

In honor of Halloween, here’s SciFiSizzle.com’s Top Ten list of the most sizzlin’ monsters we could find. 

10. Diane
Jane Balder - V
Hungry, hungry alien.  Very hungry alien. Not only would Diane intimdate you with her power, she’d also steal the water right out of your toilet and eat the face right off your skull. Jane Balder might not have had the longest career, but she was definitely working the hell out of her regulation lizard issue jumpsuit and blu-blockers. Let’s face it…domineering jackbooted lizard women are hot.

The rest after the jump!
9. Pris
Daryl Hannah - Bladerunner
Do androids dream of electric sheep? No, they dream of Pris. She’s a “Pleasure Model” replicant–that may sound innocuous enough (ok, appealing), but in all 32 versions of Bladerunner, she is wiley in her manipulation of JF Sebastian, and makes a decent attempt at killing Deckard. I think I’d definitely prefer the gymanstic pleasure-model-Pris than the gymanstic going-to-snap-your-neck-Pris.

Blade Runner – The Final Cut (Two-Disc Special Edition)

Warner Home Video 2007, DVD, $7.44

8. Bride of Frankenstein
Elsa Lanchester - Bride of Frankenstein
If youv’e got bolts in your neck, you’re pretty much sizzling by definition. Besides, if she wasn’t hot, why would Amy Winehouse have stolen her look? Oh, wait, that’s only because she’s already dead. And it’s kinda sad that I don’t know which one I’m talking about.

7. Carrie
Sissy Spaceck - Carrie
I can see your dirty pillows. 

6. Queen Kong
Unkown - Queen Kong
Let me just make two points.  1) Animals don’t hire lawyers. 2) Her breasts are as big as a Volkswagon Beetle.  I rest my case.

5. 50 Foot Woman
Allison Hayes  – Attack of the 50 Foot Woman
See #2 above. Who doesn’t love a monster that could give birth to you all over again? Once, there was a Charles Bukowski short story about a ‘witch’ who shrank a man down to six inches and…um…well…you get the idea. It wasn’t pretty.  Luckily, Allison Hayes is.

4. Dana Barrett
Sigourney Weaver  – Ghostbusters
There is no Dana, only Zuul. Man, there is just something about a chick that can levitate four feet off her bed. Apparently, possession does a body good as Sigourney is still lookin great.

Ghostbusters (Widescreen Edition)

László Kovács (Cinematographer). Columbia Pictures 1984, DVD, $3.93

3. Queen Akasha
Aaliyah - Queen of the Damned
Aaliyah was smoking in life, and probably still smoking when they found her. She could have sucked the life out of me anytime. 

2. Selene
Kate Becksinsale  – Underworld, Underworld: Evolution
Let’s see… Super-hot Kate Beckinsale? Check. Skin-tight Leather? Check. Knives? Check. Guns? Check. Fangs? Check. Yep, there is pretty much nothing un-sexy about Selene in the Underworld movies. Well, as long as she likes you. Just remember, if you survive a night hooking up with Selene, sneak out after the sun has come up.

1. Dawn
Jess Weixler  – Teeth

Vagina dentata, anyone? Not that I have issues, or anything, but the one with a cooter full of teeth came in first. Actually, she’s the only one that came because SHE CHEWED THE PENIS OFF WITH HER VAGINA.  It’s a Halloween list, so she wins due to extreme scariness, and extreme sexiness.

Teeth (Ws Sub)

Mitchell Lichtenstein (Writer). Weinstein Company 2008, DVD, $6.55